This morning, my dear, sweet, caring husband asked me if I thought my blog was “professional” enough.  He stated the fact that my biography reads that I’m a ninja might turn people off.  He tried to sandwich this by saying that he loves my sense of humor, but now that people are actually reading my books, I might need to take a different approach to what I put out there for public consumption.  Comparing my site to other authors’ sites had him a little concerned.

I laughed at first, but then his words started to sink in.  What if I AM a little unprofessional?  What if my sarcastic posts DO turn people off?  I grabbed my laptop and was about to do some ‘research’ into perhaps creating a more professional feel to the things I’m putting out there for the public to see.  Before I ventured off into full-out author website stalker-mode, I decided to check my email first.  I couldn’t have made this email up, and how perfect the timing was.

Colleen:

The first 2 chapters had my heart fluttering. It takes a lot to do that. Layken and will blow.my.mind. > > You have such an amazing talent. Thank you for sharing it with the world (just don’t return to the world of ninja fighting anytime soon, I want more books!!!!). > > Sorry for being so demanding, I mean if you want to be a ninja instead of making my life better with amazing books then by all means.

XXXXXXXXX

lol.  What a perfect e-mail at a perfect time of paranoia.  Of course I read it out loud to my husband, and immediately thanked this reader for her sarcastic e-mail that saved me from the realm of professionalism. 

Now, back to kicking bad-guy ass!

 

I had my boys assign a number to each name, then they randomly picked numbers.  And the winner of the kindle fire is…

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Jennifer LaFon!  Congrats Jennifer!!!! Email me your address and I’ll get it in the mail to you as soon as the post office starts running again next week.    colleenhoover@msn.com

Slammed has reached it’s highest (lowest? I never know which term fits) rank today coming in at #215 in overall kindle ebooks.  I sooo want to see the 100′s by June.  How awesome would that be?  Pretty damn awesome.  Oh, and here’s some good vibes to my dear, sweet J. Sterling!  <3

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Yes. ^^^^Those are actual good vibes.

 

He simply says, “WWCND?”

If you missed all the hilarious Chuck Norris comments, go read them here.

And the winners from yesterdays giveaway are:

Patricia Nesbitt

Debi01760

and you know how I can’t stop when I’m supposed to, so Lily Sooklal also wins! 

Send your addresses to colleenhoover@msn.com and I’ll get your books in the mail! <3

I just give my goods out for free.  But since you all are pimpin’ it so beautifully, it’s the least I can do.  How about we give Nickelback a break and make this giveaway all about Mr. Chuck Norris.  Give me your best Chuck Norris comment, and I’ll draw two winners from the comments at random tomorrow to get BOTH signed books.

 

Createspace and Amazon have finally come to an agreement to ship internationally to Europe!  ‘Bout time.  This is good news numero uno.

Good news numero dos is that I got a new car!  And this one actually has a/c and doesn’t die at red lights. I. Love. It.  I know most cars are female, but my car is a boy.  It’s a GMC Acadia, and since Will and Layken Cooper pretty much paid for it, I named him Cooper.  And it’s fitting because GMC stands for ‘Gorgeous Mr. Cooper.” 

Good news number three is that my mommy got a new car, too. 

Good news (sort of) number four is that I have the opportunity at this point to become a writer full-time.  I won’t be working at my eleven hour a day job for much longer.  I’m nervous, I’m happy, I’m sad, I’m devastated…all at the same time.  It’s not every day that people get the chance to follow a dream, so I’m thankful to my husband for working so hard and giving me this chance.  <3

But hell.  I am going to miss the shit out of my co-workers.  The most lovely, amazing, selfless group of women I know.  It’s not often you can throw a group of females together for long, long stretches of time and after four years they STILL love the crap out of each other.  It’s rare, and it makes me sad to throw a kink in our harmony.  But their support and encouragement despite what it means for them is exactly why they are the best gals in the whole dang world.  <3 <3 <3

Good news number five is that I get to see my lil’ sis in two weeks.   And if karma loves me, she and I will be seeing The Avett Brothers in concert.

I.

Want.

To.

Go.

So.

Bad.

In the spirit of Mother’s Day, I’d like to give a shout out to my mommy.  Hi mom!  *waving*  Here are some things I love about you.

10) I love that you are a ‘cool’ mom.  Growing up, I was never embarrassed by you.  I always wanted to be the type of mom you were.  I mean, what other mother (and grandmother at that) has an undying love for Lil’ Wayne?  You butterflying rock!

9) I love that growing up, you never interfered with our goals in life.  I never once remember you putting pressure on us to do something that would make us wealthy.  You always stressed the importance of just being happy.

8) You gave me my sense of humor.

7) When others would suggest you seek a psychiatric consult on my behalf, you scoffed at them.  You loved and embraced my oddities, rather than trying to flush them out of me.

6) You somehow maintained an open mind in the midst of a closed-minded world.  I’ll never know how that happened, but I appreciate that about you.

5) You. Are. Determined.  It took me a while to adopt this characteristic of yours, but I couldn’t be happier now that I have.

4) You love my husband.  While it scares me that if something happened between he and I, you would take his side over mine–it also makes me incredibly happy to know that you love him enough to do so.

3) I love how when I call you, you don’t answer the phone with, “Hello?”  You always answer it, “How is my favorite daughter?  The one I love more than any other daughter on the planet, even my other daughter, Lin?”   (Sorry, Lin.  It’s totally true.  I’ll record her sometime answering the phone this way. I try to get her to stop because it’s so unfair for her to love me more than you, but she can’t.  She just loves me too damned much.)

2) I love the way you love my boys.

1) Not only are you the best mother ever, you are also the best friend ever.

I freaking love you, Mom.  As Lil’ Wayne would say,

“Baby, I could bless you and you ain’t even sneezin’. I could have you dreaming and  you ain’t even sleeping. I’ll be at your rescue and you dont even need me.”

Here’s another Mom Day present just for you.  Lil’ Wayne freestyling ‘Single Ladies’  <3

First of all, a HUGE thank you to everyone that donated.  Jennifer and Clay are so grateful at the outpouring of support they have received.  Over 200 private and website donations were made, bringing the grand total to $4,520!  So thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I assigned each donation a number and used random.org to generate a number at random.  Each person was given a number for every $10 donated.  The number selected was #80.  Who did #80 belong to?

 

Channa Borman!!!

Congratulations and thanks again everyone for your donations!

Channa, I’ll be sending you an e-mail soon for more information.

 

It’s things like this that make the weeks upon weeks of endless nights so worth it.

Oh, wow.  And THIS!