I don’t want to die yet.

This blog post has nothing to do with books and everything to do with weight loss. If you’re interested in my fat rolls, keep reading. If not, you can get back to your lovely day.

I want to talk about weight loss because I’m about to embark on a really difficult journey and I want you to join me, or at least yell at me when I try to give up.

I haven’t always been overweight. Most of my life I was very healthy and active, up until I had my first child. I gained about 70lbs. during that pregnancy and dropped very little of it after the birth. I then became pregnant again, and again, and again. In a matter of four years, I was pregnant four times and each time I gained a ridiculous amount of weight.

I started out my first pregnancy weighing 175 pounds, which I feel was a good weight for my height. I’m 5’9”, and while 175 might still be considered overweight for that height, I was very happy and healthy at that weight.

In the last ten years since my last child was born, I’ve fluctuated between 250-285 pounds. I’ve done every diet you can think of, and successfully failed at all of them. At least I’m consistent!

I’m not an active person. 100% of my job requires sitting at a computer. I drink a crap-ton of Diet Pepsi while I write, along with snacking, snacking, snacking.

But here’s where weight issues really bother me. Almost every book I’ve read on weight loss (not that I’ve read that many) discusses how people have addictions to food because of emotional or psychological issues, and in order to achieve weight loss, a person must first overcome whatever causes their addiction to food.

This is crap to me. I’m sure it’s true in a lot of cases, but I think a lot of weight issues are due to the fact that food is good and we aren’t educated properly when it comes to nutrition. A love of food doesn’t necessarily have to stem from a mental or emotional issue. I have a very happy life.

I’m not fat because I refuse to overcome some emotional trauma that causes me to overeat. I overeat because food tastes really good and I freaking love it. And I’m lazy. And I hate working out. Simple as that.

My husband and I both love to eat. He’s not the type of man who has or would ever comment on my weight, so I’ve never felt that pressure to be thin for anyone. I’m not huge into self-maintenance and looks, so the fact that I’m overweight has never really bothered me. When I look in the mirror, I’m happy with myself. Yes, I’m overweight. Yes, I wish I could have a perfect body. But if I have to decide between chocolate and being sexy, I’m going with the chocolate.

I’m overweight simply because I consume too many calories. Because chocolate is good. And eating is fun. And my life is stressful, so when I want to take a break from work, I find enjoyment in food and watching TV.

However, this mindset is going to kill me if I don’t do something about it. I’m starting to feel the effects of the excess weight in both my health and my psychological well-being. When I was 29 years old and overweight, I used the excuse that I could lose weight in the future, before it started having a negative impact on my health. Well…I’m 36 now and I’m still overweight and it’s starting to scare me. I really like my life. I really like my kids. I’m fairly certain I love both my life and my family more than I love food, so I’d like to do something about it before it’s too late.

I have weighed many options, including weight loss surgery. That seems to be the easiest and fastest way, but I’m going to be honest. That terrifies me.

I have friends who have had surgeries such as the gastric sleeve, bypass, etc. and it seems to have worked out well for most of them. Two months ago I had a consultation to have elective weight loss surgery. I went into the appointment thinking I was going to schedule the surgery, but I left the appointment scared to death.

No carbonated drinks for the rest of my LIFE?

Dude. That means no Diet Pepsi. Forever.

And no carbs?

Dude. What would I eat?

I want to lose weight and I want to be healthy, but I’m not about to completely give up junk food and Diet Pepsi. Those are two of my favorite things. I want a healthier relationship with food, but I also want to be able to enjoy my favorite foods for the rest of my life. I don’t feel like I’ve given it a good enough go on my own to make the decision to remove part of my stomach for all of eternity. That really freaks me out and I’m kind of a chicken, so let’s just say I haven’t been brave enough to take that step.

I’ve decided to try this the old fashioned way. Counting calories and exercising. Both of these things suck, but being dead sucks even more, so I’m giving it a go.

I don’t want to flood my social media with my weight loss posts, because I know some of you may not care. So I’m creating an instagram that is strictly for this weight loss journey. You can follow me at www.instagram.com/colleenloses if you’re interested, or if you want to join me on your own weight loss journey. Starting tomorrow, I’ll be posting very real updates on my weight loss. If I cheat, you will witness it. You will also see me weigh in every Friday, starting with today.

Yes. I have revealed my true weight to the world and it’s terrifying.

I also bought a fitbit that I’m going to wear every day, even though I probably only average about 1,000 steps a day right now. I won’t be in competition with anyone but myself, but if you have a fitbit, friend request me using the email address colleenloses@gmail.com

I’d love for people to join me on this journey. Time permitting, I may start a Facebook group, but right now I’m only updating via instagram. I’ll be using the hashtag #ColleenLoses for all my posts. If you decide to join me in my journey, make sure to tag all your weight loss related instagram posts with #ColleensLosers and I’ll have weight-loss related giveaways every Friday through my instagram account. I’ll pull winners from the #ColleensLosers hashtag. If you don’t have instagram…get an instagram! It’s the best thing ever!

For now, I won’t be promoting any particular diet. Individuals lose weight in many different ways, so I think the most important thing is to find a diet that best suits your own needs. For myself, I plan on counting calories and making healthier choices from here on out. I don’t plan on giving up my Diet Pepsi anytime soon, but I do want to incorporate more water into my diet.

If you’re ready to get started with me, head on over to www.instagram.com/colleenloses and join my giveaway for a brand new fitbit!



We’re on a road trip back from North Carolina. 1,000 miles home and we’re trying to conquer that in a day.

What else is there to do other than update my website? You can check out my new book page here that links you to EVERYTHING in the world. It took five hours. I’m adulting so hard today.

It’s only been 2016 for a hot minute and SO MUCH has happened today!

Tarryn Fisher released F*CK LOVE and it’s already in the top 20!

Hopeless is FREE!

Never Never part one is ALSO FREE!

Never Never part three is UP FOR PREORDER!

Finding Cinderella is ALSO FREE! (Goes back to regular price tomorrow)

Lots of giveaways going on! November 9 HERE and other stuff HERE and Bookworm Box stuff HERE!



Booksting with CoHo!


Welcome to another edition of Booksting with CoHo! Today I’ve interviewed the authors of FriendTrip, M.E. Carter and Sara Ney. I saw the cover of this book and loved it and thought, in the midst of all the tears I’ve been collecting, I love to pick up a feel-good, make you laugh out loud book. Especially around Christmas. I’m also very curious how other authors experience the co-writing process, and how it feels to write a book with someone YOU ACTUALLY LIKE. Make sure to comment on this post at the bottom to enter the giveaway for a signed copy!

CoHo: I noticed you guys made the title FriendTrip one word. Is there a reason for that? Is it a play on the word Friendship?

ME CARTER: Yes. Actually, my mother named the book. And then we forgot to put her in the acknowledgements.

SARA: It’s a play on the word friendship, because we couldn’t use FriendSHIT.
Also we danced around the hotel room like idiots when we finally had our Eureka moment.


CoHo: Haha. I like FriendSHIT too. So are you two friends in real life? How did the two of you meet?

SARA: Like most successful relationships these days, we met online. M.E. Carter had just read one of my books, liked/loved it, and wrote me a love note… Fine. So it wasn’t a love note, but that’s how I’m spinning it. I was all warm’n’fuzzy until she started firing off all these questions – so obviously I sent her a short little note back. It read: “Will you be my friend?” I hope she’s not upset when I can’t remember our anniversary.

ME CARTER: A year ago, after my first book released, Sara sent me a message congratulating me from one small author to another on breaking into the indie world. What she didn’t realize is she was messaging my “alter ego” and we’d had a discussion the week prior about a blog review I had done on her first book! I, of course, started fangirling because I was a huge fan of her work. We quickly fell in love and the rest is history.


CoHo: How did the idea to co-author a book come about? 

SARA: I have a theory on this one: M.E. Carter tricked me into it, using sweet talking words and…

Fine. On top of my theory, I also have a confession to make: I can’t remember how the whole collaboration came about; where I was, who brought it up… So what did I do? I messaged her for a hint. “Don’t tell me, just give me a little hint to jog my memory.” No big deal, right? Well guess what? When she messaged me back her refusal, it was a voice message—a giggly little message. “No [insert maniacal laugh] Because I want to know what shit you come up with because you don’t remember. I win!”

She wins. I can’t remember how the idea came about.

Wait. Is this going on record somewhere?

If so, strike that part where I say, “She wins.”

ME CARTER: I’ve heard other authors say the idea hits you both at the same time. And that’s true for us. Our conversation went sort of like this:

Me: I feel like we should co-author a book.

Sara: OMG, I was thinking the same thing yesterday but didn’t think you’d have time or interest in working with me!

Me: WHAT??? You’re insane! What should we write about?
Sara: I’ve always wanted to write about a woman who is trying online dating and everything goes terribly wrong.

Me: Well I’ve always wanted to write about a woman trying to spice up her married sex life.

Sara: They could be best friends!!

Me: OK!!!

(Ok, so that might not be word for word. But it’s pretty close)


CoHo: What is FriendTrip about?

ME CARTER:  FriendTrip is about best friends in their mid to late 30’s, Becky and Janine as they navigate their way through romance. Janine is trying online dating. Becky is trying to spice up her married sex life. But mostly, it’s about the journey these two best friends take and how they help, support and make fun of each other. It truly mirrors the relationship Sara and I actually have.

SARA: Why is this so difficult to answer? Describing what FT is about is almost worse than writing the blurb. But here I go:

It’s a love story between two friends—a real relationship that isn’t always pretty. Becky and Janine are us. Your friends and mine. Two, everyday, ordinary woman who want one thing; to find the happiness within themselves.

And an iced, cold latte.

I mean—since you asked.


CoHo: I wrote a series with another author once. Once. Explain what your co-writing process was like.

ME CARTER: For me….I write a chapter and send it to Sara. When she’s done writing her chapter and sends it back, I re-read her edits on my last chapter, edit her chapter, write my next chapter and send it back. We have to be INCREDIBLY organized to not get mixed up. Needless to say, we get mixed up frequently.

But I will also say, this was the EASIEST writing experience I’ve ever had. Our humor is so similar that immediately upon reading a new chapter from her, my ideas were running wild. It was incredible. Except for a few key things, we almost never plot out in advance what’s coming and just go with the flow. I think that’s part of what makes it so fun. It was never forced.

SARA: M.E. and I have discussed this a few times; we absolutely love hate working together, and from the beginning the process felt seamless.

From the get-go—you know, after she tricked me into writing a novel with her—we brainstormed a very loose outline; we also weren’t going to share our chapter idea’s with each other beforehand, either. This worked in our favor, because it sparked our creative flow almost immediately. Rotating, we took turns writing; she’d write her chapter, then I’d write mine. Opening her chapters felt like a first date; fun, exciting, with tons of anticipation.

Well, unless you’re Janine—her dates kind of sucked.


CoHo: What is your favorite passage or one-liner from FriendTrip?

ME CARTER: Hmmm….omg….that’s so hard. I really have more than one. But I’ll stick to the sappy one. Towards the end when Becky’s husband is reassuring her that after having five children, he finds her incredibly sexy still. That was so important to me because I think so many of us really struggle with body image issues after having kids. We don’t feel comfortable in our own skin and I think it’s so important for our spouses to reassure us regularly of how sexy they still find us.

SARA: Crap, no I did not! Becky fooled me. Becky and her Jedi-mom tricks.

She knows I don’t ask guys out. They ask me. I’ve only asked one guy out on a date in my entire life, and I use the term “ask out” loosely, because I actually won him in a dorm fundraising auction in college. Instead of having him take me somewhere nice like all the other co-eds, I forced the poor kid to hand wash my dirty Bronco in the university’s parking lot because I was too scared to let him take me out.


CoHo: What is your favorite passage or sentence from this book that you didn’t write?

ME CARTER: Geez, there are so many. Sara is just a machine when it comes to writing and her wit always comes through. The line that made me stand up and cheer though was at the end when Becky says “…there’s always a story when it comes to us.” Because it is so, so true of these characters.

SARA: “You don’t seem tall enough to be a volleyball player.” His gaze turns shrewd, and he skims my body up and down with those green eyes.

“That’s what makes me dangerous,” I say, cocking my eyebrow flirtatiously and giving the ice in my amaretto sour a little shake. At least, I hope it’s flirtatious… Maybe I just sound nutty. Who knows. “I come from out of nowhere. They never expect it.”


CoHo: What is one of your favorite quotes from a book neither of you wrote and why?

ME CARTER: Honestly, I am not a quote girl. Never have been. Quotes rarely stick with me. The only thing that I can think of is something I read the other day, and I have no idea what book it was in. It said “Love is friendship set on fire.” Why do I like that? Because it is 100% true.

SARA: …tears burned my eyes, and I could do nothing else than shake my head and laugh. “God, I was so wrong about you. You’re no man. Just a stupid boy with no goddamn sense.” My voice caught then. Breathe. – Stupid Girl, Cindy Miles

I love this book—and this passage always feels impactful to me every single time I read it. I can hear the character’s voice, disillusioned laugh. Feel her pain in the passages that follow. Heartbreaking in the most romantic way. Love.


CoHo: What’s a day in your life like?

ME CARTER: Oh geez….wake up, feed the baby, take the kids to school, go to the gym, feed the baby, run an errand, feed the baby, pass baby to my dad for 10 minute of catching up online, rock the baby, pick up the kids, something with the baby, kids activities, dinner, maybe some internet time, more with the baby, sleep.

Can you tell I have a 4 month old baby?

Writing comes in when my mom can babysit for a few hours which is killing me over the holidays because of the busy-ness. My fingers are itching to get to that computer!


SARA: Soooo glamourous (I just proved it with the Queens English spelling). I start the day by deciding if I’m going to wear black yoga pants, or a printed legging—this sometimes proves to be extremely taxing, and time-consuming. Drop the nugget off at school (she’s almost 6).

Head to a writing spot; either at home, or at “my” chair at Starbucks.

Avoid eye contact with the guy in the corner.

Write some words. Stop. Poke around online. Tell everyone “yell at me if you see me online.” Log off.

Log on. Log off.

Write some more. Grab an oatmeal…. and….a cake pop (the chocolate one)

Finally feel inspired.

Pack up to grab the kids from school. She begs to go to McDonald’s for “Big Daddy Fries.” I say no. Most days.

Dinner. Bath time. Story time.

Then, choose one of the following:

Computer time, get ready for bed early, or read.

11:00pm. Still awake

11:37pm. Still awake

12:09 am. “I should read something—preferably start a new book so I can’t function tomorrow.”


CoHo: Do you guys have a list of books you’ve written on your own so we can check those out?

ME CARTER: Change of Hart and Hart to Heart. Sara’s list is MUCH longer!

SARA:  Things Liars Hide, Things Liars Say, A Kiss Like This, He Kissed Me First, Kissing in Cars.


Thank y’all so much for answering the questions, and thank you to the readers for reading. If you’re interested in a hilarious, fun book about best friends, download FRIENDTRIP now!

To enter to win a signed copy, just comment on this post below!


*No co-authors were harmed in the making of this interview. Except maybe one. Tarryn Fisher.